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Another name…on my Odessey

Time has moved swiftly on it seems. It’s hard to believe it has been two months since my last update here. Procrastination does play a part in this, but really I have had nothing new to say until now.

My swollen leg and sore throat featured in my last entry. I became concerned that the prolonged repetition of my sore throat was a strep. infection, and it had occurred to me that the swelling of my leg could be cellulitis ( when a nasty critter gets through a tiny tear in the skin) – my daughter had this when she was barely two years old, in her foot, and had had a fever. That was the one time she needed antibiotics. So I saw my doctor and he gave my throat and leg a look, and listened to my noisy chest. Ten days on, my throat is fine, my breathing much less noisy, my leg is still swollen but no longer hot and I have the diagnosis of heart failure. I’ve had it a while it seems.

Odema is causing the swelling of my leg, and fluid builds up in my lungs  when I eat and walk. This is why I often resonate with an A sharp when I breathe after this activities. My heart can no longer pump efficiently to clear my body of fluids.

This is interesting and rather fascinating, although I don’t think about it that much. To me it is an explanation of some mysteries that were so curious. It seems I had a severe chest infection, maybe pneumonia though I never had that disappearing into the mattress feeling that I experienced when diagnosed with pneumonia some years ago. Now that my breathing is so much better and I don’t need to gasp for bbreath as often as I did, I must make sure that I let my doctor know if breathing gets noisy again. I certainly feel better for sure.

A couple of close friends have commented that heart failure seems fatal. It is, but I am heading in that direction anyhow. My heart may be failing, but I’ve grown attached to it. It has so much love, generousity, compassion and empathy to give. I will not give up my ghost easily, but I will do it peacefully. My daughter still needs me and my work here is not yet done, so there will be further blog entries after this one. I just need to tackle that procrastination thing.

 

 

By Chrisssie Morris Brady

I've read poetry since I was nine and have written creatively since I was fourteen (probably long before that). After writing book reviews and social comment, I decided I wanted to write poetry. I have no formal training, but I surround myself with poets and their writing. I am honing my craft.
I have two published collections which I don't feel good about, but have been published by madswirl.com and other publications. I live on the south coast of England with my daughter. I am seriously ill.

5 replies on “Another name…on my Odessey”

I understand this so much better, now, after my father suffered nearly two attacks in the same week two weeks ago…he had uncontrollable tremors and a clotting in his chest, that deviated to fever, flu and congestion that managed to subside with antibiotics and thankfully his lungs are clear, but he still has breathing issues [that could also be because of sinus]…but that edema…my father has one in his left leg which causes him tremors and yes, those are symptoms for a weakening heart…and for a person watching these conditions, it’s scarier! I wish you the best of health, and prayers from my side for healthy lungs and for the swelling to come down in your leg. If nothing, I will pray for you and ask God to let you see many years with your daughter whether she stops to need you or not.

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I think it is suspected with my father too…because we do have Parkinson’s in the family, one of my uncles died from it several months ago…and my father is on medication for it to control the tremors…we haven’t had it tested by a neurologist… but my father had a doppler test done for his legs, they didn’t reflect anything serious…but, I guess, always better to consult specialists…it’s really hard to see the people you love not do well health-wise…best wishes to you and your daughter =)

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