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For the birds…

I have had a headache for most of this day. I am having trouble sleeping and some decided to visit me late the other evening and as a result I only got three hours sleep at the most. Lat night I didn’t sleep well as usual, so I just went out briefly to get a tiny pot of paint and fresh air.

Coming back, my neighbours’ gates were open and I saw their vine had been brutally cut back. I am so angry! It’s nesting time! That vine is cover to some many birds and many nests get built there every spring. I feel violated in my own person! The joy I take in watching those birds, because they come into my garden to feed and get water. I am growing honeysuckle, clematis and jasmine but they are not yet mature enough to provide cover. I’ve bought a rambling rose to keep a wretched cat away. In the meantime, I’ve laid holly branches to stop the cat coming in and it’s working.

Why do people not realise that we live on this planet to tend it, not destroy it? Aren’t we experiencing enough extraordinary weather events, without destroying the natural habitats in our stewardship? Governments are destroying vast ecosystems with their decisions on insecticides and palm oil etc, but we can choose to make the space that is ours a kind place. I get angry when people turn their front gardens into car parks, and I was devastated when I had to gravel over my flowerbed because I could not manage it. But I have compensated by planting trees, and making a patio pot garden. I now have a plethora of plants beginning to blossom and thrive. I have plants waiting to be planted… I love gardening, seeing bees buzzing around, birds nesting and teaching their young to fly.

Some neighbours across the road must have been told to stop feeding seagulls after a pair nested on the roof last year. It was a nightmare. No one could go in my garden without a broom to ward them off. We were attacked repeatedly. I was terrified my dog would be bitten. And of course, the garden birds were frightened. This year I have heard more birdsong than any other year I have lived here. It’s so nourishing to the soul, so life affirming, and make tending my garden even more pleasurable. Matthew and Chrisii have been helping sometimes, especially with putting up trellises. They are friends I made in the dark, dark time after my sister and dog died. When I was so bereft, and more so because a vicar I’d known for 20 years interfered with her death and broke all trust between us, so that was another loss. So many losses last autumn, friends messing on the internet with my confidences so trust broken, bitchy texts from my former neighbour who went on to lie to the police, the council and my lover about me. I made a mistake, my friend made it worse and my apology was rejected. But I am grateful for the real friends who have come into my life.

They are like a garden too. They need tending and they give a lot back.

By Chrisssie Morris Brady

I've read poetry since I was nine and have written creatively since I was fourteen (probably long before that). After writing book reviews and social comment, I decided I wanted to write poetry. I have no formal training, but I surround myself with poets and their writing. I am honing my craft.
I have two published collections which I don't feel good about, but have been published by madswirl.com and other publications. I live on the south coast of England with my daughter. I am seriously ill.

3 replies on “For the birds…”

You wrote this on my birthday. I read how you apologized, but sadly your apology was rejected. I’m a big fan of forgiveness and I feel sad when people miss an opportunity to forgive. Forgiveness benefits the forgiver as it benefits the forgiven. It’s unhealthy to carry around hate and anger. I’m Christian so, to me, love and forgiveness is pretty much what life is about. We all make mistakes, and I admire you deeply for recognizing it and apologizing. Whether our apologies are accepted is out of our control, but you did what you could to try and that is all that is expected. Having done that, try to put it behind you and move on. It’s the person who won’t forgive who remains stuck in the moment; don’t make the mistake of anchoring yourself to that spot too. If the person ever comes around and accepts your apology, make it easy for him or her, forgive them for the delay, and put it in the past. Life is too fragile and short to worry about things outside your control. Take care.

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