He
built for her a house of paper, between
low and high tide, in
the line between the sea and the sand. She
took their dead child, carried a spade, dug
into the warm earth his grave, she
mourned their child alone
Chrissie
Morris Brady
Chrissie
is much travelled and has lived and worked in several countries. She gained her
degrees in Psychology at USC and worked with recovering addicts in the LA area
for four years. She now lives on the South Coast of England where she writes.
Chrissie has been published by Ariel Chart, Bournemouth Borough Council, Plum
Tree Books, Mad Swirl, Anti Heroin Chic, Dead Snakes, and other publishers of
poetry. Her articles appear in Novel Masters, Democracy Now and other
newspapers
This is what my cottage looks like in my heart and dreams. It will look like this when I go to it from this earth…
Yesterday was such a pleasant day and I enjoyed it so much. A day shared with loved ones is always a great day, I think. Especially when you are sharing a common goal, like my garden.
Today I am towards struggling with my breathing again. I realised last night that the antibiotics prescribed this time are one a day. I had already taken four as I normally have. This means that either I am incredibly well or maybe I have compromised my immune system to some degree. I don’t like the misuse of antibiotics because my sister died of sepsis so recently. No antibiotic could save her life. I am not unduly alarmed as there is nothing I can do about it now. I need to be more careful about reading the label from now on. Lesson learnt..
I awoke earlier than expected and seemed at a loss to know what to do. I treated my sun tanned skin -it does seem to have calmed down and looks healthier. I’m not sure what my face looks like, as I haven’t really looked in a mirror today, just cleansed my face and applied a soothing cream. I expect all my freckles are out. I have a mix of European and Celt skin, so I am freckled but generally get a light tan in summer. Not that I am that bothered. My Dad and my sister used to go brown after an hour in sunshine. I always was slightly envious as I often might feel a sting on my skin after a short time in the sun. While I lived in California, however, this was never a problem. I just felt so healthy there and so loved by those in my care.
Sunshine is our best source of vitamin D which protects us from cancer. I no longer use sunscreen as I’ve learnt that it prevents the skin absorbing Vitamin D. It also stops buying #plastic which I detest. It is such a pollutant and does not biodegrade. It’s such a question of how long one spends in the exposure of the sun.
So the double nebuliser gave me instant relief, and though I did wheeze later my inhaler sorted it out. I did not sleep until after four in the morning due to its stimulant properties.
Yesterday was the best day I’ve had since my chest infection started. I slept well. Today I ventured out and got some cordials and fruit, the former to replenish and the latter to have as a cool refreshment when I feel hot and want more than a drink. When I came home I was struggling to breathe so made use of my inhaler, and rested. I play solitaire when I rest, unless I read. But it’s so hard to stay indoors with this glorious weather.
I went out a bit later, found that a friend was out so went to the shoreline to see the hills of Purbeck, but the breeze was cold there so I came home and came upstairs to write. I crawled to my bedroom as my breathing was such hard work. It is frustrating but I must adapt and accommodate it.
So this is me now in summertime in England. I love summer, but now it causes me so much struggle. Once I have a nebuliser at home, thing will be easier. But I now feel perfectly comfortable to dial 999 for an emergency ambulance.
I have made so many spelling errors in the writing of this blog. Brain fog is becoming a norm at the end of the day. I’m thankful for my spell check. I often repeat syllables too.
Writer and psychologist. My health, a journey with two life shortening diseases 
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