A tough day…

• 

This is a school photo taken when I was seven.

This morning I was woken by a text from a friend telling me that she would be coming with a some large pieces of wood that been removed from her house. She had offered them to me because I would like to have a cupboard built because there is an alcove in my dining room which gets treated as a dumping ground by my family members and my cleaner. She had arranged it the previous evening.

It is difficult for me to cope with spontaneity from other people, especially on waking. Now that I am no longer on the medicine that normalises my breathing. I went downstairs to wait and then realised that I could be waiting for an hour as she’d given me an hour window. So I put the shed key a work top in the kitchen, unlocked the back door and tried to get on with a writing project. I kept misspelling, making silly mistakes, I mean more than usual.

My friend called up the stairs, so I told her where the key was. I’d had to put off someone who had wanted to come to visit. Then I realised that some stuff my daughter had bagged up but not taken to the refuse bin (which went missing during Friday evening) was still on a dining chair s0 I took it to the same friend to but in her refuse bin.

I sat with her for a while in her garden, which looks so pretty. I feel so wretched that she has used so much water, far more than necessary, and was able to buy fairly mature plants. I wish a gardener had advised me that tubs of plants require more watering and as they had seen me really struggling to breathe, would have told me I would not be able to manage the watering.

I had intended to phone the council to report my refuse bin missing, but I had been told I was going to hear from a police officer so I didn’t want to use my phone. Then I got a notification on my laptop telling me I had issues with my Microsoft account so I went to that. It turned out that my two step verification had been turned off. I had not done that. So now I feel even more alarmed and in need of the police.

I have had quite a bit of pain today. I don’t know why. One of my hips sometimes gets a nerve pain, and then I find it painful to walk.

I haven’t opened all my mail yet, and it’s time to go to sleep.