Strange headache…

I awoke with a headache at 5.30 am. This is not usual, so I dozed. The headache did not go so I had to cancel with a friend. This was a bit of a blow as I haven’t seen her for ages. I rested and drank plenty and began to feel better by lunch time.

My cleaner has had to swap to tomorrow as he had a job he needed to finish. It’s made me feel oddly discombobulated. With lockdown Mondays have been my only fixed point in the week. Zoom meetings are fortnightly with others that I choose to join dotted in between.

I have already watered the garden. It was a bit early, but it has not been hot and we have had rain. I have more strawberries on the way, but am sad to see the rose for my sister bruised by the rain. My tomato plants are hanging in there until Pete can help me tomorrow. They need stronger stakes.

This morning I kept jumping when the builders started. I did feel very fragile at the time.

I took a watch bracelet to have a purple watch face put on it. I had discussed it before lockdown, but as I started shielding on the 6 March this was my first chance to take it in. The mall seems more scary now than before the pandemic. It seems half lit and there are arrows everywhere which people seem to ignore.

I do still feel a bit not quite myself though. I have drunk plenty and eaten fairly well. I’ve lost a little bit of weight in the last two weeks as my watch is a bit loose. I shall treat myself to something tomorrow. Maybe two things and maybe bake a cake.

I wonder if M has rearranged his flat? It can’t be nice to have one’s home on public display especially as some of it belongs to H jointly. It’s hard to believe some of what he has done.

I thought of my Dad so much yesterday. I used to take him out and give him a present. Often something he needed but the colours he liked. Or a natural history book – birds, or trees. I can’t believe there are people who throw away their Dad for an alcoholic.

I’m looking forward to bed tonight. I want to sleep away this fragile feeling.

Author: Chrisssie Morris Brady

I've read poetry since I was nine and have written creatively since I was fourteen (probably long before that). After writing book reviews and social comment, I decided I wanted to write poetry. I have no formal training, but I surround myself with poets and their writing. I am honing my craft. I have two published collections which I don't feel good about, but have been published by madswirl.com and other publications. I live on the south coast of England with my daughter. I am seriously ill.

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