I am now depressed and somewhat angry…

My fatigue and muscle ache after the tests at the hospital have morphed into a depression. The longer I felt unable to go out, the more I became afraid to go out. I missed a poetry event which is a really bad sign. I haven’t got dressed for two weeks.

My wrote to the council to ask what behaviour of mine has caused my neighbours to blame me for their move.

I am told I have reported their everyday business to agencies and named them in my blog.

Firstly, I have not reported their everyday business to anyone and secondly I do not give my address in my blog or even the town where I live.

If their name appears anywhere, no one can identify them and further no one is interested in them.

I am angry because ‘reporting their everyday business to agencies’ is libel. I am tired of libel against me,

Because I’m an at risk group with Corvid19, I am beginning to feel isolated and lonely. I do like my own company but there is a limit before isolation takes hold.

My cleaner came today. He works so hard and is loyal. I asked him to plant my plants and tomorrow I will water with liquid seaweed.

Today has been our warmest day so far. I turned my timed heating off. It will stay off unless we get another cold spell.

The pain in my hip has gone again, thanks to meditation. I see my meditation on pain as prayer.

I have forgotten to mention that the pain I used to get in my shoulder and arm have gone.


Asked out on a date…

Today has been a day of getting nowhere. Until after business hours. I called the agency to do with the person spewed anger all over me. I got stonewalled.

This caused me much frustration. My cleaner came and sorted my life out, in that the cleaning I can’t do is done, my laundry hung, a birthday card to my cousin sent.

My cleaner is now going back to be with his wife because her grandmother is dying. He has had such a hard time with grief recently.

On things are going well. In a steady, slow way I am building followers and readers of my articles. It is quite tenuous getting started, but now that I write for a publisher, it gets a bit easier.

A friend has asked me on a date. I’m worried because I am not attracted to him. I enjoy him as a friend.

Tomorrow I must sort out where I get my prescriptions filled. The pharmacist I was using nearby closed and my records were sent to a huge supermarket of health and beauty products. They don’t deliver. I must go back to the pharmacy I left.

It’s all so much work. It is relentless it seems. Just trying to live.