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Entertaining Angels…

Yesterday, through a complicated story that I won’t tell here, I became involved with a lady on a website who was looking for someone to clear and weed her garden. I ‘offered her a solution’ by recommending someone to her, and because I clicked on the ‘solution’ icon I was told by the website that I would get her money that she had set as payment. I was puzzled by her confusion as she seemed to think I would be doing her garden. This confusion persisted while we were exchanging texts so I tried to call her but her phone doesn’t take calls. But we arranged to meet, and it turns out she is deaf.

So I took a notebook and my mostly forgotten British Sign Language, and she arrived with her husband and toddler who are also deaf. They are a lovely family. The husband told me his father and grandfather were deaf. I asked if they would have cochlear implants for their child. The father replied no, because the hearing world should learn sign language. I have known for a long time that many deaf people feel this way, but to look at a tiny child and know he will never hear anything is a shock. They were very nice to me, thanked me for my recommendations and help, but made it clear that don’t want to teach me more BSL or become friends because I am not deaf, and don’t belong in their world. In a while, though, I will ask again if they will teach more sign language. I learnt quite a bit of ASL when I lived in the States, as the youngest daughter of a family I lived with had a speech impediment so she would sign, and we all signed with her too, as well as speaking.

On my way to meet this family, I ran into difficulties with my mobility scooter. A young man asked if he could help me. He pushed me to an ATM, and then to the cafĂ© so I could meet the family. He said he had to get some shopping and he would come for me after 45min. This was perfect. So he came back and brought me home and wondered why my battery had not charged. I keep my ‘trolley’ as I call it in my lean to porch, but there is no door, so I said to him about making a door from a shower curtain to pull across. Later while I was doing stuff, I realised I’ve been given several sheets of wood. So I messaged him the idea of making a gate. He already said he would come back, so he said we can discuss ideas then.

I am so full of gratitude. I was able to make recommendations to this family. I met this very kind young man, and his partner is expecting a baby so I shall have a lovely little tiny human to buy cute things for.

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So glad it rained!

Yesterday it rained, much needed water drops fell on my garden and watered my flowers and plants. I was delighted and was leaving the supermarket when the first drops fell. I laughed with pleasure, and expressed it to a passer by, who smiled.

A friend was waiting in my porch when I got home and she helped me put my groceries away before we made a cup of tea and sat to chat. Yesterday was such a different day as nothing unexpected happened. I simply went from one task to another, not tiring myself, just paced and relaxed. Another friend joined us for dinner which we all prepared together under my guidance. Afterwards, I realised my second guest had never tried humous, sweet potato, or avocado. And didn’t eat any. Oh well…

All the time taken in preparing the meal and the rain which had become a downpour prevented planting new plants but the evening was lovely in a social, family type of way.

So I am ‘looking after’ a couple of people in my life who are having a tough time with stress and anxiety. I have chosen to do this because I care about them. This week though I’ve had requests to intervene from others who get paid for their work and I’ve realised I need to state (again, because it’s happened before) that I need payment, either in kind eg household jobs or gardening or financially. I need a text response that says The Doctor Is In or The Doctor Is Out. To take on others’ problems with no notice is an emotional and physical drain. I need to watch this so that I am not taken advantage of.

Who tends to benefit from your career path without giving back to you? How do you address this. I’ve always loved helping people so I find I can be drained before I realise. Ideas please…